Narcoleptic Shock
by alchemic-rose
Summary: The daring duo take a break from their frog hunt to get some shut-eye. Unfortunately, sleep does not come as easily as one may think. DavexJade oneshot w/ epilogue. Picture is not mine.


Dave managed to fall asleep… finally. It felt like he hadn't had slept in days, but with all of his time travel that could be a true fact. He'd been helping Harley collect frogs for the past couple of days. It was a lame job by his standards, but Jade had insisted it was very important that she complete this quest and hey… if was to help a friend, he'd do anything (within reason of course). Jade had another bout of narcoleptic induced sleep, and claimed the bed in the building they crashed in while they were working on her quest. Having found a semi-comfortable spot on the floor (after stealing a few blankets), Strider passed out slouched over, his chin tucked into his chest and his blonde hair settling over his shades. He'd been resting for what felt like minutes when piercing shriek cut through the sound of croaking frogs.

"HOLY BEJEEZUS!"

Dave exclaimed as he about jumped a foot in the air, jerked out of his slumber, his arms flew up to defend himself as his tired eyes scanned the room for the origin of the cry. _'No freakin beastie is sneaking up on me…'_ The frogs had gone completely silent, probably as scared as he was by the sudden interruption. Well, HE wasn't scared… just kinda freaked out. Dave jumped again when the screaming picked up again and he whipped his head around to see Jade suddenly sit up on the bed, flailing her arms like she was being attacked by a swarm of bees.

"S**t…"

He stared at her flailing figure, first, in utter shock (and slight horror) from her hysterics, and secondly, seeing if she would snap out of it and wake up, but as usual… Lady Luck decided to be a b***h and ignore his hopeful wishes. Dave kicked off the blankets and scrambled over to his flailing friend when she started pulling at her hair and scratching her face. She had given herself a few shallow scratches by the time he managed to snatch her flailing limbs from her face. Grabbing her by the shoulders and shook her to try and wake her.

"Jebus Jade! Wake up! You're freaking out!"

'_Freaking me out…!' _

She continued to thrash and yell gibberish, her face scrunched up in terrified ferocity. He struggled with her, until a particularly hard smack from her arm sent his aviators flying off his face onto the floor. Cursing, Dave backed away from his friend in a hurry before she could get to him with her nails and turned to retrieve his glasses. In one gesture, he swiped them off the floor and back on his face, slightly crooked from their abuse.

"Dammit."

Strider turned to stare back at his friend's continued episode, utterly at a loss.

'_I can't frikin sleep with all this racket going on and she's gonna flippin hurt herself if she keeps this up…'_

He grabbed his phone and logged onto Pesterchum. With relief he saw that John was on and frantically (ok, not frantically but with urgency) typed in a message.

-turntechGodhead began pestering ectobiologist-

[TG] dude

[TG] john you sisters flippin out

[EB] she's what?!

[TG] flippin the f**k out

[TG] its a night mare or some s**t like that

[EB] oh…

[TG] and she wont snap out of it

[TG] to be true bro

[TG] shes scaring the s**t otta me right now

[EB] D**M! uh…

[TG] what the hell do I do

[EB] well

[TG] shes gonna flippin hurt herself and im gonna lose my hearing

[EB] Oh god. did you already try shaking her awake?

[TG] yes dipwad

[TG] and I got smacked for it

[EB] oh

[EB] did you yell at her?

[TG] you bet your sorry a** i did

[TG] nothin

[TG] not even a break in screeching

[EB] …

[EB] well….

[EB] um…

[TG] john

[TG] there better be some freakin way to wake up your crazy sister

[TG] and I need my f***in sleep

[TG] and my f***ing hearing

[TG] john

[TG] JOHN

[TG] OH MY GOD BRO

[EB] just grab her

[TG] …

[TG] WHAT

[EB] just grab her. that way she won't hurt herself or you.

[TG] you want me… TO GET close… to a RAGING MAD CAT

[TG] my face will be turned to mince meat

[EB] trust me

[EB] she'll calm down

[EB] just grab her into a hug or something

[TG] …

[TG] this better f***ing work

-turntechGodhead ceased pestering ectobiologist-

Dave captchloged his phone and turned back to the tortured female. Jade's hellish screams were becoming a bit hoarse and out of breath which gave his ears a bit of a break from the screechy tones. Unfortunately, she was still swinging like a crazed badger. He gritted his teeth, bracing himself.

"Dammit."

Stretching out his arms, he walked slowly over to the bed, as if he were approaching a dangerous animal. (In a way he was, but that is beside the point) Dave's shaded eyes tracked her flailing arms, trying to avoid their barrage and catch them at the same time. Quickly he snapped his hand out and grabbed one flailing wrist. He grimly smirked at his progress only narrowly avoiding a smack from the other hand. "Whoa!" He dodged, still keeping hold of the other wrist, which she tried to wiggle from his grip. He frowned in frustration (As this was a hell of a lot more frustrating than catching those d**m frogs) as he went in between leaning to catch the other hand and avoid her nails.

"Dammit! Jade!" he swiped at her arm, just missing it.

"I'm. Trying. To. Help. You. Dammit!"

Dave attempted again to grab her flailing limb, this time catching her sleeve. "Ha!" He grinned a bit in victory and turned towards his friend, only to see her head a lot closer than was comfortable.

CRACK!

A sudden pain exploded from his already aching temple, and he almost lost grip of his "catch".

"OWWWWW! FREAKIN. CRAP!"

Wincing from the intense throbbing in his head he glared in disbelief and pain at the girl in front of him. _'She freaking head butted me! FREAKIN. HEADBUTT. Egbert you are so dead…'_ Luckily, that defense move seemed to stun her a bit, the screaming stopped entirely and the flailing reduced to a wimpy flapping. Dave bowed his head, his crooked shades slipping down the bridge of his nose as he grimaced trying to recover quickly before Jade came out of her temporary stunned state. "So not f***ing cool…" he muttered.

After a moment of painful recovery, he felt Jade's flailing and her attempts to slip from his grip resume. Dave looked up to see her mouth open to begin yelling again at some unknown enemy.

"Oh no you freakin don't!" he yelled as he let go of her wrists, lunging forward and wrapped his arms around her, pinning her arms to her sides. He locked his arms tight as they fell towards the mattress. He noticed her round glasses fly off her face and somewhere onto the bed as they landed. Immediately, she began writhing and struggling like a trapped bat. Dave winced as her foot painfully met with his shin; luckily her arms remained pinned. _'There's no way in hell I'm letter her go or I'm going to freakin get eaten.'_

"LET ME GO! LET ME GO! LET ME GO!"

Dave ears rang from her crazed hollering as she struggled to get her arms and the rest of herself free from her friend's "bear hug".

"No way in hell Harley."

Immediately, as if she heard his negative reply, began head-butting his chest, though not as hard as she hit his head due to the lack of "wiggle room". The phrase "Let me go" turned into her mantra as she fought against his grip, her yelling gradually lessening in volume.

"Let me go… let me go…" she whimpered as her head assault on her friend's chest great weaker until in eventually stopped and rested against him. He almost sighed with relief. _'Oh my freaking god FINALLY.'_ His chest throbbed along with his head in pain; he winced, keeping a strong grip around her, just in case she decided to flail again. _'No way in hell am I gonna go through catching her again… jebus…'_

Dave waited for a moment, and then began to gradually relax his arm's restraint around his friend. Jade's shoulders begin to shake, and he tensed up, tightened his grip again, fearing that she would go into "Round 2" of hysterics. A small sob sounded against his chest and he looked down at Harley. More sobs, each one growing in volume, came from the girl he gripped onto and tears began to run down her face from her closed eyelids.

"…."

"S**t"

He stared at Jade's face, which twisted into a miserable expression. Dave relaxed his grip, now holding her in a loose embrace. _'Crap…. Crap, crap, crap, s**t, crap. She's crying. Oh my god, what do I do. Sweet jebus. Crap!'_

He felt her tears begin to soak into his shirt as she cried against him, sobs shaking her body. Jade began mumbling something incomprehensible under her breath between sobs as Dave watched in an awkward silence. _'Holy hell… first she tries to kill me, now she's using me as a giant tissue…' _

"…"

Gently, gave her body a reassuring squeeze against his before relaxing his arms again. He rested his chin on top of her shaking head. _'Ok… trying to comfort, I guess. Hell, what the heck was that nightmare?'_ She continued to sob, hiccups appearing every now and then. Dave sighed, not trying to be completely awkward, shifted his free arm (the one not pinned beneath Jade's body) and began rubbing circles on her quivering back.

"It's ok Jade… Strider's got you."

"Just calm down, ok?"

"You're going to drown me if you keep crying."

'_Huh… how ironic… death by tears. Rose would never let that one down…'_ he made a face, and then rolled his eyes. _'Whatever…'_

Time passed slowly as he rubbed her back, Jade's breathing gradually returned to a normal pace, and her sobs faded away until only a few hiccups that shook her small shoulders remained. Dave sighed with genuine relief, and stopped rubbing her back, then looked down to see his friend's tear-stained and scratched face finally relax. He smirked; she looked like some rag-a-muffin puppy. The thought relating to her appearance was so ironic he almost laughed out loud. _'Now I can finally get some friggin sleep! I sure as hell earned it.'_ He removed his arm from around her and began to wiggle his other from under her torso when she stirred.

He froze, hoping to god that she wouldn't wake up, when he felt her arms travel up from her sides to encircle his middle. _'Oh s**t. Oh hell no, you are not using me as a human body pillow. S**t, s**t, s**t….'_ Dave began internally freaking the f**k out as Jade snuggled against him, nuzzling her stained face against his damp shirt as she gripped onto him like a leech. She grew still and relaxed with peaceful smile forming on her sleepy face. Dave was in shocked silence, unable to escape from being latched onto as one of his arms was still trapped beneath his friend. "S**t" he whispered under his breath. There was no way he would wiggle out of her clutches without waking her up (which would end up in an incredibly awkward situation that he wanted to avoid at all costs.) He was freakin trapped.

Jade hummed happily in her sleep, causing Dave's pale cheeks to flush with color. _'Oh s**t. Oh god. No one can find out about this. It's already bad that Egbert suspects that I might have tackled Jade to prevent her from hurting herself but know she's being a leech, crap what the hell do I do?' _

He stayed still as a board while internally screaming in his head for a few minutes. Soon the throb in his chest and head came back with intensity as his adrenaline rush wore off. "F**k…" His weariness finally caught up with him and he relaxed into Jade's embrace, draping his arm back over her body and rested his head just above hers. He stayed silent for a few moments as he noticed the frogs croaking pick up again, returning the night to its normal tones. Gradually, Dave accepted he was stuck in this position until morning, so he tried to relax… but his nerves were on fire, despite being completely exhausted. Strider's personal-space bubble had been completely popped by the cheery narcoleptic. Now he found himself trying to sleep with a koala cuddling him. It's not that he disliked the warm embrace he found himself in… it was a heck of a lot better than crashing on the cold floor with s**ty old blankets for warmth. He just wasn't used to such… physical closeness with another person, especially with a girl. His bro raised him (d**n well he did), but no such "cuddle sessions" occurred… that was pansy girl stuff. Cool guys don't "cuddle" with their bros, just fist bumps and smacks on the back. Dave sighed in exhaustion and resignation, adjusting his head as her flippy hair began to tickle his neck a bit.

"Look… I'm tired as f**k and now you've got me trapped." He mumbled into her hair. "So… don't freak out in the morning… it's your fault…" She sighed, almost as if in response, her hands briefly clenching the back his shirt on a reflex as she snuggled closer to him. A fresh blush rose to Dave's cheeks and he squeezed his eyes shut, willing himself to fall asleep quickly and deeply as possible. Jade's heart beat against his chest, and soon his own matched her slow pace as he quickly fell asleep from stress and utter exhaustion, with a small smile on his face.


End file.
